Friendship Skills: 5 Simple Conversation Starters for Kids

Is your child struggling to make friends? Whether they’re starting a new school or feeling shy in social situations, knowing how to initiate conversations is a key skill for building friendships. The good news? Friendship skills can be taught and practiced, just like any other skill!

In this blog, I’ll share five simple conversation starters for kids, along with tips on how to talk with your child about starting friendships. I’ve also included adaptations for young children and tweens/teens, as well as helpful parenting scripts to guide you through these conversations.

5 Simple Conversation Starters for Kids

These five conversation starters are designed to help your child break the ice and feel more confident when meeting new friends:

1. “Hi! My name is ___. What’s your name?”

This classic introduction is simple but effective. Teaching your child to start by sharing their name can help them feel less nervous and open the door for more conversation.

2. “Do you want to play ___ with me?”

Whether it’s a game, a puzzle, or a fun activity, inviting another child to play is an easy way to connect. This approach works especially well with younger children, as play is a natural bonding experience.

3. “What’s your favorite __?” (e.g., game, TV show, animal)

Asking about someone’s favorite things helps kids find common ground. Encourage your child to ask questions like, “What’s your favorite game?” or “What’s your favorite animal?” These simple questions can spark conversations and lead to fun discoveries.

4. “I like your ___. Where did you get it?”

Compliments are a great way to connect with others. If your child notices something cool about another kid, like a backpack or a toy, they can offer a compliment and follow it up with a question. This shows kindness and curiosity, two qualities that help form friendships.

5. “Have you ever tried ___?”

Encourage your child to ask about new activities or experiences, such as sports, hobbies, or games. Asking, “Have you ever tried ___?” can help them learn more about the other person’s interests while keeping the conversation going.

How to Talk with Kids About Starting Friendships

Starting friendships can feel overwhelming for kids, especially if they’re nervous or unsure of what to say. As a parent, you can help ease their worries by having open conversations about making friends. Here’s how to approach these discussions:

1. Focus on Positivity and Curiosity

Teach your child that making friends is about showing kindness and being curious about others. You can say,

Parent Script: “Friendships start when we show kindness and interest in others. Asking someone about what they like to do or inviting them to play is a great way to connect!”

2. Normalize the Process

Explain that it’s normal to feel nervous or shy about meeting new people. Share stories from your own life to show that everyone feels this way sometimes.

Parent Script: “It’s okay to feel a little nervous about making new friends. Even adults feel that way! The important thing is to try. Sometimes it takes a few conversations to really connect with someone, and that’s totally normal.”

3. Encourage Effort Over Perfection

Reassure your child that they don’t need to say the “perfect” thing to make a friend. Effort and kindness matter more than perfection.

Parent Script: “It’s okay if the conversation doesn’t go perfectly. What’s most important is that you tried to talk to someone new. Every time you try, you get better!”

4. Talk About Boundaries and Respect

Teach your child that while it’s great to be friendly, it’s also important to respect others’ boundaries. Not everyone will be ready to play or talk, and that’s okay.

Parent Script: “Sometimes, people may not want to talk or play right away, and that’s okay. We can always try again later, or find someone else to talk to. The important thing is to respect how others feel, just like you want them to respect your feelings.”

Ways to Practice Friendship Skills and Build Confidence

Practicing conversation starters at home or in familiar settings will help your child feel more comfortable and confident when it’s time to meet new friends. Here are some ways to practice:

1. Role-Playing Scenarios

Role-play different social scenarios at home to help your child practice conversation starters. Pretend to be a new friend at school, at the playground, or at a birthday party, and have your child try out the conversation starters.

Parent Script: “Let’s practice! I’ll pretend to be someone new at the playground, and you can introduce yourself. You can start by saying, ‘Hi! My name is __. Do you want to play ____ with me?’”

2. Use Everyday Interactions

Encourage your child to practice conversation starters in everyday settings, like at the park, a family gathering, or when meeting new kids at extracurricular activities.

Parent Script: “The next time we’re at the park, why don’t you try asking someone, ‘What’s your favorite thing to do here?’ That way, you can start a conversation and maybe even find someone to play with!”

3. Practice Nonverbal Skills

Teach your child that body language, like smiling and making eye contact, is just as important as what they say. Practice these nonverbal cues together in a fun and supportive way.

Parent Script: “When you’re talking to someone new, it’s helpful to smile and make eye contact. Let’s practice smiling and saying, ‘Hi!’ to each other—it’ll help you feel ready for when you meet someone new.”

Adaptations for Different Age Groups

Friendship skills develop differently at various stages of childhood, so it’s important to tailor your approach based on your child’s age and maturity level.

For Young Kids (Ages 4-7)

At this stage, play is the primary way kids build friendships, so focus on making connections through shared activities.

• Keep It Simple: Use short, clear phrases like, “Let’s invite someone to play!”

• Practice with Toys: Role-play with stuffed animals or action figures to make the practice fun and engaging.

Parent Script: “Let’s pretend these toys are new friends. How would they introduce themselves? Maybe they could say, ‘Hi, do you want to play with me?’”

For Tweens and Teens (Ages 8-14)

Older kids are more self-conscious and may feel greater social pressure, so focus on building confidence and resilience.

• Acknowledge Social Anxiety: Let them know it’s normal to feel nervous, and that making friends can take time.

• Set Small Goals: Encourage them to set realistic social goals, like starting a conversation with one new person each week.

Parent Script: “I know it’s a little nerve-wracking, but you could start by asking someone about their favorite class or what they like to do after school. Even just talking to one new person can help build your confidence.”

Ready to Help Your Child Build Friendship Skills?

By teaching these conversation starters and practicing them regularly, you’ll empower your child to approach social situations with more confidence. Friendships are a valuable part of growing up, and with a little guidance, your child will learn how to build meaningful connections.

Looking for more ways to help your child thrive socially?

Sign up for my Friendship Course for Kids! This course will teach your child how to navigate social situations, handle conflicts, and build lasting friendships—all while boosting their confidence and communication skills!